A large part of grief counseling is trying to make meaning of the loss. One of my favorite activities that we do with children is to ask them to complete an open ended phrase (for example: complete the phrase: Being a teenager means...) We then take their sentences and put them in the form of a poem. I chose to complete the sentence, "Losing a Parent on 9/ll Means" using the narratives of the young adults who were teenagers when their parent died on 9/ll from my dissertation study. I hope this gives you a better understanding of what it means to lose a parent on 9/ll.
Losing a Parent on 9/ll Means…
Losing a parent on 9/ll means how much of the story do you tell people and how much will they ask?
Losing a parent on 9/ll means I just kept thinking he has to come back cause I’m only 13.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means I’ve become more independent, I had to grow up faster, I didn’t get the chance to say goodbye.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means we couldn’t have a funeral until they had at least a piece of him.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means Father’s Day stinks.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means people say with time the pain fades, but I don’t think that’s true.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means I live with more fear; I’m more aware of what could happen.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means I didn’t stop believing, but why would God do this to such a great man?
Losing a parent on 9/ll means I like to think my Mom is still around.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means you always pictured your wedding day to be perfect and your Dad’s not going to be there; that’s not perfect.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means when you read about the event in history class it really hits you, “Wow, this happened to the world.”
Losing a parent on 9/ll means it wasn’t my choice my Dad was killed, I had no say in it.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means I don’t want September 11th to define who I am.
Losing a parent on 9/ll means it really really sucks, but I can’t change that.
